"Glosta."

According to Eloy, "This race be dope. Highest level of awesomeness level possible." And after coming home from my visit to this seaside community, I must concur. Very high levels of awesomeness.

After being spoiled by dry and sunny weather last season, the start to Cross 2011 was not looking good. Unpredictable at best. Rain, wind alternating on and off during my 2-day stay in New England. Despite everything I learned from Myles' excellent cross talk last year, I get to the call up area having not pre-ridden the course, or warmed up. Yikes. Kissena was represented in the Cat 4 35+ category by myself and Ben Reid. Alan Atwood was there organizing results, handling call-ups etc, running all around the course with laser-like focus. No other current Kissena's racing here this weekend, although Britt-Lee raced tough in the Pro 1/2/3 women's field, and Dan Chabanov was racing with the big boys sporting his new Richard Sach's kit and bike.

The organizers used crossresults.com rankings to line us up and I was pleasantly surprised to learn I got a 3rd row call-up on day 1. It was all for naught though. The night before I overhauled my rusty pedals with little difficulty, but my rusty legs and brain were not up to the job when the whistle blew. I had trouble clipping in and I watched as most of the entire field flew by me as I stomped and stomped. "Pedal" I heard guys shouting at me. Oh yeah, I should pedal while I try to clip in. Duh. Once the brain got kicked started, the legs followed and I started raging through the long and interesting course. I would do 4 laps by the time all was said and done. Like William during his Hillbilly adventure, I absolutely crushed it on the "roadie" sections. They had a Euro style stair astro-turfed run-up/ramp descent that was a thrill this year. I also made up ground and passed people on sloppy muddy run-ups and barriers. In the end I sprinted for 33rd place finish. Ben finished his race in 86th place.

After the race, I hosed down the bike and myself at one of the park's outdoor showers, changed into dry clothes, went to nearby Ipswich where they were having a Clam Chowder cook off competition and sampled and voted on like 8 different chowders. After lunch, back to the race to enjoyed some Brooklyn Ocktober Fest beer and the day with wife and dog. Good times, really good times.

Not to create a frenzy like the markets have seen, but I figured several of you would want to know.

I've never been, but I hear it ranks really high on Eloy's awesomeness scale.

I am seeing reg opening on August 22nd

http://www.bikereg.com/events/register.asp?eventid=14027

This race be dope.
Highest level of awesomeness level possible.

Dan,
D'oh! You know what they say about cyclists...not very bright.

I'll go with your post. And Eloy's sentiment.

I really enjoyed this race last year. Not going this year, but worth a weekend trip if you've never been before.

Day 2, I was determined to start stronger, but I had a headset that was rattling and shaking something fierce. Fortunately, this UCI weekend was stacked with vendors and mechanics willing to help. A calm Mavic wrench took my bike from me and threw in an extra spacer and bam headset fixed. Of course while doing this, he pointed out that my brake pads were absolutely down to nothing. Which I kind of knew, but hadn't gotten around to ordering new pads so I pretended they didn't matter. I was in luck though, he had a set of pads and slipped them in just a few minutes. I paid him for the pads, gave him a nice tip for the work and got all skin suited up for my race.

This time I had a few more minutes in hand to warm the legs up and so I did. I still haven't figured out the on-the-course warm-up routine that would make a huge difference in my overall performance. But at least today, the legs wouldn't be cold. Another 3rd row call-up and this time I was focused. I reversed my normal starting pedal position and clipped in with the "problem" pedal first, while my left foot was on the ground. This all felt very awkward, but only for the couple of minutes waiting for the whistle and the first couple of pedal strokes. Click, click. We're off and I get to the hole shot about 20 or so riders back. Here a frustrated calm sets in. The guys in front of me aren't going too fast and I've got more to give, but I don't know where the course is going, so I have to play follow the leader for much of the first half of the first lap. As the field thins out I turn up the heat and start passing people, but not at the clip or with the ease that I was yesterday. Of course, I know I'm near the front of the field and that in itself is another kind of exciting dynamic. Heading into a steep descending ramp into a beach I hold my breath a little. Normally I would break and get off early and use my running skills for the whole crossing. But for some reason, I decide to just go for it. No breaks, I see some tracks in the sand, I aim it and let gravity do its thing. I'm still upright and pedal a few strokes taking me 3/4 of the way through the beach then I start to swiggle and slow. I see riders fall over as they try to clip out after they've completely stalled, so I jump off while I've still got a bit of forward momentum and it pays off big.

Taking two steps at a time, I'm passing people easily on the stairway climb back up from the beach. Jumping back on the legs spin wildly. Nooo! Dropped chain! (first time dropped in 2 years) I hammer on the left shift lever and the derailleur grabs a little chain and throws it in the big ring. I've always felt the big ring a little useless in most cross races, but on this gravel-strewn, wide and straight road stretch, it's an unexpected bonus. I pull up to a rider with big ring ease!

With just one lap to go (long laps, just a 3-lap race), I'm pushing it hard to pass and drop riders. I'm doing well in most sections except these slalom-like "S" bends through grassy stretches. Guys are catching me big time as I struggle to find the fastest lines through this seemingly benign stretches where I ended up having to hammer the breaks coming out of these turns to avoid breaking tape. I get passed with just 1.5 k to go and lose ground on some muddy off camber up and down hill climb/descents. I start to pull back time as the road straightens out. Over the barriers, he's getting a little closer.

We're on to the pavement finishing stretch. It's a little climb that is very similar in length and pitch to the final sprint on Kissena group rides. I'm closing fast but running out of road. The rider in front of me by 10 or so bike lengths looks back. That's right I'm coming to get you! The crowd is going crazy. Muscles are burning, bike is swaying. As the line approaches, I throw my bike and slump in pain and disappointment as he holds on by 1/2 a front wheel. I came in 14th.

Sarah tells me that RIchard Fries and his announcing partner had a little fun with our sprint too. The conversation went like this:

"Hey, do you have to have a pony tail to ride on Kissena?"
"Yeah, I think it's a rule the JP Partland put in a few years ago."

Ben later tells me that he made up his mind to race harder on day 2 and the results showed that he improved about 20 spots from Day 1, finishing in 69th place. Not too shabby for races that had over 100 guys on both days. Hit up a local awesome diner called Georgie's off the beat and path for a top-class brunch after the race before watching the rest of the day's action.

sounds great

very exciting report!

nice work

hot.

dude, 14th, nice!

Glostah!  Who is in?

I'm in.

Me too. And I'm sure Ben Reid is too. That's his personal World Championship event.

Please note, that the organizer is having some trouble getting permits for the usual location. Keep this in mind as you are making housing arrangements.

Reg'd!
May FSM have mercy on my call up...

Jules said:

Reg'd! May FSM have mercy on my call up...

Your call up will be excellent. You have basically the same pointage as me. Which means we should both be in the first couple of rows. Which means, we both have no excuses for sucking. Except that I generally have been sucking, and you generally have been kicking ass (brand new cat 3 in the hizouse!) so I win the race of low expectations already. Bring good mud tires. Lots of off camber turning on this one.

Marc Bertucco said:

Jules said:

Reg'd! May FSM have mercy on my call up...

Your call up will be excellent. You have basically the same pointage as me. Which means we should both be in the first couple of rows. Which means, we both have no excuses for sucking. Except that I generally have been sucking, and you generally have been kicking ass (brand new cat 3 in the hizouse!) so I win the race of low expectations already. Bring good mud tires. Lots of off camber turning on this one.

I will likely suffer my usual fate; catch guys on the power sections only to lose them whenever the most elusive of CX skills is required... TURNING.

Attention Gloucester-ites.  We have a team tent space, and a team tent.  There will be folding chairs and whatever other sundry heckle-worth accessories we decide to bring, including but not limited to Cow-sized Cowbells (not the little feeble ones they hand out like crackerjack box prizes) and some cans of Pork Slap I've been saving since 2008.

While I am well aware that Pork Slap is a beer I like it better when I think you said Whoop Ass.

FYI, as much as we all love Gloucester...hot tip for parking in the park. It kind of sucks. Most of us are racing in the early a.m., so we'll be able to grab a spot, but if you leave after your race for some breakfast and return expecting to easily find a parking spot, you will be rudely slapped in the face. I mean, we're New Yorkers so generally not phased by crappy parking situations, but you know...just a heads-up. It's really the only thing that sucks about Gloucester.

Also, thinking about the last 3 years that I've done this race, the course changes moderately from year to year, but there is a feature that has been included EVERY year I've done it. I need to invent/discover the term for this popular course feature, but it's basically repeating square shaped upside down U-s on right side up lower case n-s, where you climb up a short grassy/muddy slope, 90 degree turn at the top of the hill, off camber ride across, 90 degree turn down the hill, another turn up the hill, across the hill and down.

Sometimes I rode the whole thing, other times I was forced off the bike and ran it. Sharpen those toe spikes and get ready folks. At Gloucester, it ends with a terribly fast descending, often muddy off camber exit behind a baseball diamond backdrop that is worthy of repeating multiple times in warm-up. All the pro men did. So as you are out there practicing your skills, keep in mind this feature. I'm going to assume muddy rainy conditions, and this is a section of the course that will have a large impact on your race.

Marc Bertucco said:

Also, thinking about the last 3 years that I've done this race, the course changes moderately from year to year, but there is a feature that has been included EVERY year I've done it. I need to invent/discover the term for this popular course feature, but it's basically repeating square shaped upside down U-s on right side up lower case n-s, where you climb up a short grassy/muddy slope, 90 degree turn at the top of the hill, off camber ride across, 90 degree turn down the hill, another turn up the hill, across the hill and down.

I think HPCX (or was it Whirly Bird?) had this as well; it was like surfing a wall of grass... up & down and up & down... heaven help those caught behind because it's an inevitable crashfest... thanks for the Beta Hotlist

Whirlybird had it.

I ran that Whirlybird stuff every time and I'm certain I finished faster than had I attempted to ride it, and I'm certain I forced guys who were trying to ride it to finish slower. I race like a dick sometimes.

I think I have race video from Whirly Bird.  If so I'll post it when the race comes near.

Hot tip for spectating at Gloucester...if the course is wet and muddy, then the spectator zones will be too. I've been bringing "duck boots" to cross races for the last couple of years and never regret having these waterproof, mud-proof boots to throw on as I wander the grounds watching other categories race.

HOTLIST WHERE ART THOU?!?

Helmet or Stem mount for the GoPro this weekend?

(I can't figure out how to embed a poll so I thought I'd just ask)

In a world where personalities cannot be split, Hotlist has taken a surgical blow and Bertucco might have to bow out this weekend--which is devastating to him. But at the moment he's having troubling swallowing without massive pain for one (intubation sucks). But, I can type out a few last minute tips for this truly great weekend of crossing in Gloucester MA:

1. Finger on the nose, not it, call shotgun, whatever you have to do NOW because the list of brews on tap at the beer tent is going to make your mouth water. Ommegang, Hoegaarden, Allagash, Magic Hat, Wachusett, Sierra Nevada, Fishermans, Shock Top, Goose Island, High and Mighty. I've never even heard of some of these beers, but I'm sure they are all tasty and when bought in a bottle have some cool irreverent illustrated labels that will make you feel extra cool drinking.
   
   
2. In for a scare? Well, the world's most boring and yet oddly addicting TV show, Ghost Hunters, visited nearby Hammond Castle. I don't remember the episode exactly anymore, but I'm sure one of the investigators, thought he heard a sound that was really scary. http://www.syfy.com/ghosthunters/episodes/season/8/episode/23/paranormal_pioneers.
   
   
3. Watch the pros. Seriously, dudes. YOU MUST WATCH the pro race...I mean if you have to jet, you have to jet. But this is a great spectator course and with delightful weather and beer on tap? This is going to be an amazing Sven Nys-free smack-down of this countries best (not including one Jonathan "I make bizarre decisions in life, like skipping out on quality UCI racing against your domestic competition, earn valuable UCI points to line up for some weak-ass Euro-races where I will struggle to crack the top 20 and don't care what Hotlist thinks" Page.) Watch and learn.
   

Okay, now what about your race?

There's a little something for everyone. Try and pre-ride if possible. I know this seems like banal advice, but really you can't overestimate the importance of dialing in your turns. I mean, lots of folks will focus on some crazy run-up/dismount section, (i.e. the number of people going into deep meditational analysis at the base of the Nittany dirt run up/log leap always makes Hotlist chuckle), and there is a time and place for that.

Once, twice up it. Realize that the early laps, in traffic, you are going to have to run up, so figure out where you should dismount, run up it. Then in your second hotlap, try riding it for later laps when the only traffic you are competing against are your personal daemons. Do it, and be done with it.

Because if you look at the rest of the course, ask yourself where are you going to lose more time, a 20 second run up, or 3 minutes of wide grassy turns that will have you tangoing with course tape and/or sliding sideways on your crisp new white kit, if you are not prepared.

One final hot-tip (for tonight, until my narcotic pain killers kick in and Hotlist is inspired again)...BIG RING. It's the only race of the year, where Bertucco has been known to put even his wildly inappropriate 48-tooth big ring to use. It's a descending gravely fire road that leads into another section of grassy twisty-turny bits.

Team KCC have arrived minus our fearless leader who opted to keep his stitches where the doctor left them, lest the medico make good on his threat to "sit tight or I'll sew your earlobes to the bed!" Joaquin and the Roazens pace lined up most of 95; unsure how the fates made that happen but we're taking it as a good omen for tomorrow. Tent arrived just in time too; we'll be doing donut nibb and pork-slap hand ups all day...

@Jules - I vote helmet mount because I'm imagining your head will act as a natural gyroscope.  Not a big problem on pavement, but probably makes a big difference riding cyclocross.

Yaaaaaawn.  New England Nationals have begun, mostly.  Josh is on his way to reg and the coffee is brewing!