Kissena Forum Archive

Close Encounters of the #%&*@! Kind (Legal too)

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guys

please don't ride flatbush to/from floyd.  not sure your bad luck happened on that blvd of death, but it just sucks.

there are plenty of mellower routes.  take an extra 5 minutes and spare your self the homicidal dollar vans and other sundry motorists who don't give a shit.
or a flatbed semi...^
WilliamDC said:

there are plenty of mellower routes.  take an extra 5 minutes and spare your self the homicidal dollar vans and other sundry motorists who don't give a shit.
Map one from the Manhattan or from GAP or it doesn't count.

jp: i'm going to stuff you in a locker next time you pass me in the hall
Using google maps estimates, GAP to FBF via Flatbush is 7.0 miles, 41 min
but it does NOT recommend it. It tries to put you on Bedford no matter how much you drag the little line over to Flatbush ave

Via Bedford 8.3 miles, 50 minutes.
https://www.google.com/maps?saddr=Plaza+St+W&daddr=Flatbush+Ave&hl=en&sll=40.591763,-73.897605&sspn=0.028645,0.066047&geocode=FW6dbAIdkE6X-w;FaRaawId7l2Y-w&dirflg=b&mra=ltm&t=m&z=13&lci=bike

Its Bedford Ave to AVE M to side streets over to AVE V, and onto Flatbush.

Now their time estimates may be off a bit for us, but it gives you an idea for the proportion of the change. I've used Bedford a bunch and it is not perfect, but its way better than Flatbush is.

If you want to remove some of the turns on the side streets, Bedford to Ave U to Flatbush, 9.1 miles, 53 min. So 12 minutes over the orignal time estimate.

Now that I have mapped it, maybe I should drag my butt out to FBF this year :)
WilliamDC said:

jp: i'm going to stuff you in a locker next time you pass me in the hall
WDC, you can try.  last time someone attempted a similar stunt, they ended up with their tighty-whitey waistband at their ears and hoisted up a flagpole.  And that's not a good look for you.

Josh, thanks.
Jules said:
I got mistaken for Myles today (or the other way round?) by some tri guy in a "Snapple" unitard. This is how it ends?
Apparently we have a MOLE!  Reveal yourself Mr. Unitard... it is only a matter of time before our computers identify you...


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnVRGt8EE3s&feature=youtube_gdata_player
On Jul 11, 2013 4:06 PM, "Jules" <
mugwump said:
WilliamDC said:

jp: i'm going to stuff you in a locker next time you pass me in the hall
WDC, you can try.  last time someone attempted a similar stunt, they ended up with their tighty-whitey waistband at their ears and hoisted up a flagpole.  And that's not a good look for you.

Josh, thanks.
i never pictured JP as the high school bully.  turns out, he's a sweep the leg guy.  "You couldn't leave well enough alone, could you, little twerp? No, you had to push it. Well, WDC, now you're gonna pay!"
dstearns said:
i never pictured JP as the high school bully.  turns out, he's a sweep the leg guy.  "You couldn't leave well enough alone, could you, little twerp? No, you had to push it. Well, WDC, now you're gonna pay!"
Stearns,
I didn't write I was going to be involved.  Things happen.

@dstearns

Yeah..JP is from Jersey after all. Do not misunderestimate his relationships my friend.

I don't know how to file this one, but a goddamn honey hit me square in the mouth @ 45mph today (my speed 27mph + approx bee velocity of 18mph), the fuzzy sonofabitch stuck lodged himself between my lips and humped his evil spike into my lower lip with instantaneous efficaciousness. I swiped the bastard away managing to keep straight on the shoulder of the fast moving highway of cars and wind. The pain increased and I peeled off onto a side road, coasted while inspecting the lip, pulled the fucker's prickly fang out of my lip and felt the rising adrenaline call for a TT home. Would my lip swell up to add massive grams of drag to my return, or --like last time I was bee stung-- would my muscles go goofy and my brain set to a dizzy? I didn't wait to ponder it, my legs were pumping out of some primordial know-do that lip sting pain comes at an inverse ratio to sum total pains of the animal...

I pumped the pedals home against a massive headwind, tryin' to press the poison out my lip and all the energy matter out of my legs in one swoop.

Once home, I found that the bee sting was little swollen and only slightly sore. My internal adrenaline (yo, epinephrine!) must have neutralized that venom with wonderful wonderment.

I just hope the same works for the wolf and grizzly bear wounds I'm sure to encounter up and down into the deep Northwest forests that will soon become my habitat.


I hot hit once right over my heart - I thought I was having the Big One until I discover the still-pumping-venom-corpse attached to me...

No bee sting story is complete with the JV picture

image
For some reason I can't stop laughing at that JV picture. It's just too funny.
yeah, JV's situation looks terrible there...

Speaking of eyes: A Japanese beetle struck me in the eyeball at high velocity on the prospect park downhill a few years ago... that was more painful than the bee sting, thought my eyeball was dislodged --perhaps replaced by the beetle. Actually it was more painful than my collarbone break, at least the initial impact and immediate suffering, but it didn't last as long and I didn't pass out.

Taught me to always wear eye protection.
normanzo said:
Taught me to always wear eye protection.
ALWAYS.

(Especially with CX season approaching and all those pokey tree branches...)
Well, I got a summons today in Prospect Park.

Seconds after entering the park I came upon a red light (the first one after the 3rd street entrance where I come in). There were people in the intersection. I slowed til it was clear, rolled through slowly, and the fuzz swooped down.

Acknowledging that "the rules are the rules" and that what I was about to say is not an argument against my own infraction, per se, I explained to them that I didn't understand the enforcement. I pointed out that every time I'm in the park, I see 50 instances of rule breaking far more dangerous than what I did go unchecked, including many that happen right in front of police officers, and that it seemed confusing that I'd get ticketed for safely rolling though an intersection when the status quo is that much more dangerous behavior is acceptable.

They were "sorry (I felt) that way" and explained that this comes "straight from the mayor's office."

I explained that the mayor was an evil Wall Street subservient militaristic ass-face who bought a third term with his own personal fortune and therefore I did not respect his rules. Then a mosquito size drone flew down and tazed me and I fell to the ground. They kicked me, repeatedly, saying - now you know how it feels to be a minority!

Okay, the above paragraph is false. But the rest isn't. 
I want to both "awesome" and "dislike" this post but I'm afraid I'll break the forum.
What a joke.  The NYPD is basically a fascist bully with no direction other than status quo.  And yes, Bloomturd is a hypocritical scumbag.

The question to them is how are you to know that you're supposed to stop at a light when the road is closed?  As it is, it's clear that pedestrians don't treat either the bike lanes or the lights with the deference they would if it were an open road.  therefore, you fail to see how the light is something you're supposed to obey.

Apropos of your earlier discussion, I wrote both TA and the DoT suggesting to put the dangerous speeding (aka "know the speed limit") ads in the subways.  

http://www.nyc.gov/html/dot/html/motorist/knowthespeedlimit.shtml
^Yeah, while they're at it they should put those ads in NYPD stations
@mugwump. The subway doesn't have the right target audience for those ads. It should be on billboards near highways and other outdoor ads that reach drivers. I agree with the campaign, it just needs to use the media buying dollars in the most efficient way.

@Ryan J

You'll have to appear for the ticket as it is an actual summons. You'll likely have to go to the Red Hook Community Justice Center. Dress appropriately (I would actually wear a suit) and when you get there, try to meet with the DA. Explain that you have no idea about the rules (as suggested by JP) and that with a clean record could the DA offer a dismissal. 

The good thing is that this is a real court with a real DA, so you get to talk to and deal with the prosecutor (in my wrong way case, the DA asked for dismissal). The bad news is that you just can't send in a fine.


The cop straight up told me "you'll just have to appear and explain what happened and then the judge will throw it out." Which is maybe the most annoying part of the whole thing.
@mugwump. The subway doesn't have the right target audience for those ads. It should be on billboards near highways and other outdoor ads that reach drivers. I agree with the campaign, it just needs to use the media buying dollars in the most efficient way.
Craig, 
It's absolutely the right target audience.

It seems that the biggest problem in the acceptance of cycling in NYC are the people who believe that cycling and cyclists are dangerous (that Iris Weinshall, a former DoT commissioner, would champion cars on PPW is an easy example).  They treat the threat of driving and motorized vehicles as a given and the injuries and deaths that occur as merely "shit happens."  

The skeptics would look at bicycle transportation differently if they had an understanding of the threat that motorized vehicles present and how drivers exacerbate the problem.  Many subway riders are car owners and renters and might start to think twice about speeding when driving.  And those who don't step into cars could possibly start looking at the cars careening down Flatbush as a bunch of reckless scofflaws who present an unacceptable threat.
mugwump said:
And those who don't step into cars could possibly start looking at the cars careening down Flatbush as a bunch of reckless scofflaws who present an unacceptable threat.
^^I think that's the big one, right there.
What were the stats from the last 4-5 years in the greater metropolitan area?  Zero people killed by cyclists and thousands killed by cars?
What were the stats from the last 4-5 years in the greater metropolitan area?  Zero people killed by cyclists and thousands killed by cars?
Nobody on this forum disagrees with the absurdity of the situation.  The topic came up yesterday over post-ride beers - how do you navigate past the initial "confrontation" stage with a cop/motorist/dumbass on foot to where any productive exchange can take place.  It ain't easy.

If I can paraphrase one participants view, "The outcome is fixed (I'm getting a ticket for sure) so I just want the satisfaction of saying something snide."

I don't think the outcome is fixed, but it takes SO MUCH interpersonal jiu jitsu (and time) just to de-escalate that it may not be worth it.  JP, Canadian Mike and I managed it with a foaming-at-the-mouth Sherif last fall but wow... it sure looked UGLY there for a while.

I think in general if one is aware of one's own appetite for a "jab" you have a better overall chance; but clearly it takes much more than impeccable manners.
Yeah, the cops generally do not want to listen at all.  They just want to lecture and power trip.  Like you said, it's hard to even calmly have a discussion with people when they've already made up their mind from the echo chamber they live in and come to any sort of conversation.  To diffuse the situation takes time, and yeah, you're right in that most just want to vent and go on their way.  Everyone is busy.

I can think of like 2-3 times in the last 7 years that my run-ins ended well.  The day before I got hit, I was in a bike land and a salmoner was coming at me, so I had to move into the road a bit.  This guy in an SUV (b/c of course) starts honking a lot.  Generally a brief "toot" or something doesn't bother me, but this sounded aggressive.  So when he passes I tell him to calm down.  So he slows and leans out of his window.  His arms are bigger than my legs.... Uh oh!

He explains he was just letting me know he was there.  I tell him I had to move over b/c the idiot going the wrong way (I find complaining to motorists about other cyclists' bad behavior helps get you on "their side") and that just a light beep of his horn is enough, that otherwise it comes off as really intimidating, and that as cyclists we're really vulnerable.  He says that's cool and that he didn't mean to scare me.  I'm all like "it's no problem, I appreciate the concern.  Have a good day".  And he's like "You too buddy, I hope you enjoy your ride".

WTF?  A normal, mature dialogue with another adult in NYC?  It *can* happen!  But that's unfortunately like 2% of the interactions...

Like the Alpine park lady from yesterday.  I've had 4 encounters with her.  The first two I was nice.  But she always throws in jabs in her instructions that are really condescending.  So I gave up and decided to give what I got.  Helpful?  No, but talking with her is going to go nowhere. 

@ Owens - I tell the crazy alpine patrol lady that I love her in response to whatever ride single file nonsense she is babbling.